berlin tour 2011

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so, day 1 of the berlin tour 2011.. place is in a heatwave at moment so stinks a bit more then usual.. going to get fitted for laderhosen and a nice alpine hat later, after visiting the museum of thick socks which is always a highlight of any visit to berlin..

visited checkpoint charlie last night, but found no monkeys, hitler-esque comedians or bolivian marching powder ANYWHERE.. very disappointing..

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so, the museum/nevar forget/exhibition of nazi paperwork was depressing.. dyk, ud be locked up for 2 years then deported for carrying a bundle of anti-volks FLYERS back in the day? kissing a jew would get you up shit creek, and if u were on the dole or a tealeaf, ud get a special green triangle badge to wear.. awesome.. i'll say one thng for the nazis, they sure knew how to type..

today is sovblok techno day... ".. in search of robotron.."

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museum of video games on karlmarx way is quite awesome.. they had a COMUTER SPACE cab - green, and a PONG, but they only turn them on to play with on mondays, so therefore they are cu*ts. also on show, an odyessy, plenty of cart gear, a PET 2001, and they have a Gauntlet machine (german language) with orig monitor, and an emulateted ASTEROIDS in an orig asteroids cab, which was a nice touch, and what appeared to be a real CENTIPEDE cab, but with an LCD screen.. also, a frogger, all original..

also on show, plenty of locallised consoles and such.. defo worth a go, but try it monday as then u might get to play COMPUTER SPACE..

computerspielemuseum, karl-max-allee 93a, 10243 berlin.
www.computerspielemuseum.de

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schneidersladen was easier to find in daylight.. layout has changed, but the mall it's in has become even more sinister and pee-soaked, with the worst infestation of tagging evar.. still, nice to see a shitload of obscure modular all ready to rock.. wanted to see the new FLAME gear, only the knobby thing was on display, kinda like 2 of the knobsequencers on the CLOCKWORK in a 1u frac module.. failed to get a demo of the speakjet device or the effects unit, aw.. but, SO MANY new manufacturers of modules now, and some neat tabletop noisemakers too.. refreshing in this world of fart-smelling apple fail virtual nonsense..

also: nearby in www.berlinischegalerie.de a sitload of early 20th century flyers and fanzines, dada stuff, and lots of that hungarian bloke's work in the name of surrealism.. futurism, abstract art, pre-computer graphics and so on.. really awesome stuff, and easily the grumpiest staff of any gallery in berlin - and that's sayng something!

also: every tv network in the world is here this week, spliced with cnn, bbc, nhk and cbs in the space of an hour of lurking, pretended to be german and explained how we germans were proud to be the dominant financial force in europe and how pwning the rest of europe makes us hard and cool..

also: the 90's revival is the only game in town, 3 competing 90's gigs on this weekend in the area, with the highlight being a PA by REDNEX.. fu*k yeh.. tresor's 20th pales into insignificance when comared..

today's mission: goosestepping for jeeeesus...

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yesterday was revealing.. being friday, almost every restaurant, bar and shop had a live "dj" playing.. i have to say i was disturbed by what i saw. case1: a sports brand store, full of ltd. edition designs, all 20% more expensive then normal, with a bird spinning vinyl, mostly 80's, no mixing skills whatsoever, but on-message, playing some good tunes from 82-88, commercial rap etc on 7-inch and LP.. ok, an ipod on shuffle would have worked as well.. it reminded me of the 'mini song' scene in DEMOLITION MAN, tunes al out of context, but enjoying a new life.. oh, did i mention all the radio and gigs here are 80/90s revival? ok, so you get the picture..

Then to later & case2, in an asian restaurant.. fine food, but another unskilled dj, using serrato/vinyl, playing COMPLETE shit. all new rap/r n' b, but sample-based, all ripping off classic commercial american funk and black music.. horriffic.. wtf, playing another lazy whitesploitation soft-rap track, lifting DIANA ROSS' "i'm coming out" - WHY NOT PLAY THE ORIGINAL YOU FUC*ER.. the irony? it was a restaurant serving cuisine from a country the yanks RAPED, and a german guy was badly fading bad track to bad track, sometimes using EQ or filters on his mixer for no reason, using vinyl as a controller.. kill me now. please.

This is the mighty berlin, and aside from AUX88 playing tonite in tresor tonite, and the awesome 4-piece in the b-flat club last night, the slate is blank, with doodles of wanabee and poor understanding around te edges. face facts: it's over, DJing as a culture is finished, it's gone into reverse... if it ain't a live show, it's some asshole..

meanwhile, in a toilet of a sushi bar, i see a sticker for WHAT WHAT records on a urinal - proof that there is still hope for music here..

today's mission: 1962 adidas and james last on vinyl

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i just know you are going to like this..